The General Specifics

I killed my earlier “About Me” page.  A lot has happened since then and I no longer want that to be the representation of me here.

I’ve won Spider Solitaire’s Difficult Level 3 times.  Yes it’s true!  Actually, the third time came an hour ago.  That’s what prompted me to reintroduce myself.  I’ll never admit how many moves it took to seal the 3rd win though.

I used to be a dog person.  Not anymore!  I am now the proud owner of an inappropriate amount of cats.  I love cats and how you can leave them for days and they are just fine without you.

I can’t won’t cook, because, “I’ll just make a mess of it.”  You’d be surprised how many situations beyond the kitchen I use that saying.  It’s practically my new mantra.  My friends accept it and I love them for it.  Posing for pictures, giving advice or wrapping gifts – I’ll just make a mess of it.

I was born with a wacky gene that makes me think babies might be evil (I say this with some trepidation because some people out there, really love babies).  I’m usually waiting for the giggling to stop, their eyes to blacken over and sharp teeth to plunge from their smooth gums just before they lurch for my neck.  I need to retrain my brain with heavy doses of Anne Geddes photos because the Masshole and I are seriously considering starting a family.  She’s going to house this tiny monster in her belly while I convince myself it’s a bundle of joy, not terror.  Babies aren’t like cats and we all know now what I love about cats.

I’m a licensed automobile driver with a clean record.  95% of what I say is true, unless it’s categorized under “Fake News”.  Then it’s only half-true.  I have to change the names and genders of certain folks so I can make fun of them but still get invited to their parties.  I’m often tired and I can nap like nobody else.

18 thoughts on “The General Specifics”

  1. I’ve nominated your blog for a Versatile Blogger Award, which means that I find it as amusing as hell. Thanks for keeping me entertained!

    Click back onto The Dissemination of Thought to find out what the award is all about.

  2. talker96 said:

    The Onion is frustrating for the simple fact that they have about ten writers only and they never hire any new people, which is odd because you’d think that they would eventually get burnt out. Even Saturday Night live changes its writers every so often, but the Onion has had the same people for nearly twenty years.
    Of course, if you were not serious in your dream job statement and I said all this for nothing, then I feel like an idiot and please disregard this comment.
    That said, nice work.

    • I have always wanted to sit in on a writers meeting but I had no idea their writing staff is so small. What a closed little society they’ve developed then!
      I appreciate you for reading because I thoroughly enjoy your stuff.

  3. Hey Adrienne, it’s award time (again)! I’ve nominated you for the 7 x 7 Link Award – jump over to The Dissemination of Thought to find out what the hell I’m talking about.

  4. Wow, it’s a shame. I thought I had subscribed to this blog weeks ago! My apologies! I am now ready for the goods! : D

  5. I’ve not nominated you for anything. I just hope you get your dream job. And I follow you.

    • Thank you! I just want to make a stupid amount of money writing headlines. Hell, I’d even write a few sentences to support that headline. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.
      Thanks for reading and welcome to it!

  6. I have nominated you for another FANTASTIC award. It’s called “the cat fart award” and it’s extremely prestigious! They’ll probably mention you on the news! (no….no they wont)

    Thanks for wanting to read the garbage that spills out of me.

  7. As the owner of a recently former baby, you are right. And by two years, they are full blown sociopaths.
    All the best,
    s

  8. I’ve bequeathed you a Liebster. I’ve bequiebstered you. No returns!

    http://rossmurray1.wordpress.com/2013/02/02/liebster2/

  9. I think we now know that we can NOT leave said cat’s unattended…not even a litle bit.

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