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So you want to have an orgy?!  Well good sir or ma’am I will unlock the secrets to having that orgy you always dreamt about.  If you follow my simple step-by-step process you can spice up your old Friday night traditions.  Single?  In a relationship?  It’s complicated?  No matter what your Facebook relationship status, this guide is one-size fits all!  

Happy guests make for a happy orgy

ROOM SET-UP

The integral part of any orgy is communal sex.  Therefore, everyone must be in the same room.  “But my bedroom isn’t big enough for everyone!”, you say?  Move that coffee table out of the living room and open that living room up!  Spare no expense!  Go buy some nice throw pillows, maybe a couple chaise lounge cushions, a futon mattress would be nice.  You want everyone to have an enjoyable group sex experience don’t you?!  We don’t want anyone getting a cramp from strange, makeshift, positioning or dealing with sore joints from hard flooring!   Have some masks available.  Lotions and oils are good to have on hand as well.   

Gather ’round, get comfortable

 

FOOD

Before the orgy-ing begins, you must fuel up!  Any good host provides finger foods.  Now you can get really creative and playful!  You could opt for sex or genitalia influenced food or view the food as fuel for your sexual romp.  Do you carb up or give them some hard salami?  I definitely suggest lots of fluids and bananas to avoid cramping during your session.  Bananas are fun for the ladies to play with as well.  

She’s not going to cramp up!

Alright, the party is in full swing.  Everyone’s enjoying themselves.  The vibe is good but all of a sudden an interloper is caressing your back.  Don’t let your inexperience rattle you.  You must quickly remind yourself that this is the nature of the orgy.  Some people just choose to float from couple to couple.  Stroking backs, fondling a breast or two but don’t be alarmed.  This is not creepy behavior, it’s the nature of the orgy.  Accept it and keep on pumping away.   Grab a handy mask so you can narrow that vision and hone in on the task at hand.   What if the floater is a male and he’s caressing your balls?  Don’t bow up and cause a scene, just switch positions and lay on your back so he can’t access the booty.  That non-verbal communication will be enough to let any avid orgy-goer know that you’re not into that.  Embrace the free love, think on your feet knees and keep thrusting away!  Once you feel comfortable enough, switch it up.  Remember you are there to enjoy as many sexual partners as possible.  Bring someone else into the fold or move about the room and get in on some other action. 

Have an orgy Caligula would be proud of

After the post-coital bliss subsides and the orgy is all but over, thank your guests for coming over.  Perhaps offer a parting gift?  Some small candles.? You can tie a small hand-written note around the outside of the glass or make a label with the date of the orgy.  You want to make sure your fellow orgy enthusiasts leave with a good taste in their mouth.  A personal touch goes a long way with lovers of group sex. 

 

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